The blockage in my intestines finally cleared... over and over again, all night and most of the day. On top of that, I'm kind of down in the dumps. Not for any real reason, probably a combination of being tired from the exercise, bored and frustrated with the low-carb business, and lack of sleep. I left the house to try to lift my spirits, but it didn't work that well. I was ok while I was out, and as soon as I stopped moving I started feeling like crap again.
I went and did a little bit of shopping, picked up a couple of books. I looked and fancy watches that I can't afford. I wandered around Target and somehow managed to not buy beer, although I wanted beer so very badly. I managed to drive past so many restaurants, and managed to not buy food that would ruin my diet. All in all, it was a good day for self-control and restraint. Every bit of it made me feel even worse.
When I got home, I cooked dinner, and cleaned up as I went. Then, to cap off the night, I went for a short walk with the dog. No day off for me, that's for other people...
I'm not good at being good. I'm accustomed to downing a couple of dozen beers or eating deep-fried cat at the Chinese buffet when I feel bad. I usually spend a ton of money I don't have, or slack off and let the house get really messy. I'm really surprised and depressed by my adult behavior. UGH. In a couple of weeks I'm going to get a computer based on my actual needs instead of trying to get something fancy, gigantic, and sure to impress. A few weeks later, I am going to get a watch for my birthday, if I can afford it. If I can't afford it I am NOT going to buy something I won't be happy with, and I AM going to wait until I have enough money to get what I want.
Being a grown-up sucks.
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